~A Guest Post by Kat Charles~

 

Can I be gut-wrenchingly honest with you for a moment?

I don’t know what challenges you’re facing right now.  For me, this season of diapers, potty training, homeschooling, extracurriculars, budgeting, and long hours at work has been a whirlwind, to say the least.  We are so busy that our marriage is constantly pushed to the bottom of the priority list.  Staying connected is anything but effortless when so many things compete for our attention.

Yet—the effort we put in each day (however tiny) are an investment into our marriage that will pay dividends in the years to come. 

“Few human joys are as deep and thrilling as those experienced by two people who love one another and have achieved something as the result of a great, shared effort.”  -Pope Francis

So—how can we rekindle a marriage when we are crazy busy and feel like two ships passing in the night?

 

5 SIMPLE WAYS TO RECONNECT WITH YOUR SPOUSE:

 

1. Enjoy a cup of coffee or tea together in the morning before work. Unlike me, my husband is a morning person, so this was a challenge at first.  However, it was not impossible for me to commit to ONE day a week.  Now, I look forward to our morning chats.

2. Read a book together. Both hubby and I are voracious readers.  Sometimes, we choose a book to read together.  I read the print version, and hubby listens on audiobook in the car during his commute.  This is a great way to learn something new together and keep our conversations lively.

3. Exercise together. You might have the ability and the means to run or hit the gym with your spouse.  If so—that’s awesome!  If not, consider doing a workout video together.  One of our personal favorites is yoga.  Yoga is a great way to unwind and release tension after a long day.  If you can’t make it to class, and you don’t have a video, there are plenty of free workouts online.

4. Take a moment each day to check in with one another. My husband calls me most evenings on his way home from work to chat, so that we can have a few moments of kid-free conversation before he gets home.

5. Pencil in a regular date night. I’m a sucker for spontaneity, but our crazy schedules call for some intentionality.  Our weekly date nights are very low key in this season of our lives.  Don’t worry about committing to the same night every week.  Do what you can, when you can.  Just last night, my husband got called in to work.  We had about one hour for sushi and a TV show, and it was still a great time.

 

Occasionally, when we’re feeling fancy, we step out for a night on the town.  However, the cost of dinner and a movie can quickly put a dent in our budget.  So, here are three super easy ideas for a date night at home.

No sitter?  No problem.

 

3 EASY-PEASY DATE NIGHT HACKS ON A BUDGET:

 

1. Backyard Picnic – Lay out a picnic blanket in your backyard and enjoy a meal together under the stars.

2. DIY Chopped Challenge – This is based on the popular cooking game show “Chopped.”  Gather several random, everyday ingredients and challenge your spouse to create a meal using the selected ingredients.  This is a great way to have fun in the kitchen together AND enjoy a fancy meal on a budget.

3. Game Night – Play a favorite board or card game together.  My favorite game was Scrabble until my husband crushed me mercilessly.  Call me a sore loser, but I thought vocab was kind of my thing.  Seriously though, games are a great way to let loose and have fun with your mate.  Unless you’re particularly competitive and prone to hold a grudge.  Not that I would know anything about that.

 

Marriage is challenging enough—why not make things a little easier?  A tiny bit of effort goes a long way, and your kids will benefit from having two parents who like each other even more than they already do.

 

I am always on the hunt for easy ways to connect and fun, simple date nights in.  What are your favorite ways to connect with your spouse?  Let’s swap ideas in the comments!

Kat Charles is a homeschooling mom of four beautiful, high-energy kids.  She loves spontaneous road trips, checklists, time alone in the bathroom, and a good DIY project.  Kat is on a mission to savor motherhood in its entirety—the good, the not-so-good, and the downright ridiculous.  Read more about her journey and find encouragement for your own on her blog.  Follow her on social media below!

20 Comments

  1. Will send this on to my daughter. She is busy with three little ones at home.

    Reply
    • Aww, hope it helps! 😊

      Reply
  2. Girl, I’m so with you! I sometimes feel like the hubs and I are roommates more than husband and wife because life is so crazy busy. We do have coffee together most mornings before he heads off to work. It’s truthfully the most relaxing time of the day! Ha. Great tips!

    Reply
    • A little bit of quality time goes such a long way! Some day the kids will be grown and we won’t know what to do with all of the peace and quiet.

      Reply
  3. These are great ideas! My husband and i haven’t went to the gym together in a long time. So it looks like I need to schedule a gym date with my hubby.

    Reply
    • Such a great way to wind down together! Get that endorphin rush 😉

      Reply
  4. My husband and I enjoy doing yoga together too! We also have a weekly date night at home once the kids go to bed (nachos every Monday)!

    Reply
    • I love nachos and yoga! Great idea 🙂

      Reply
  5. Great ideas! When life gets busy it’s hard to remember to do this! Great reminder!

    Reply
    • Happy to help! Thanks for reading! 😊

      Reply
  6. I love the idea of chatting while he is driving home. I feel like my husband walks in the door and I want to chat but the kids are all over him and its hard for us to connect!

    Reply
    • It’s so hard sometimes when the kids literally attack him when he gets home. When my hubby gets home before bedtime, I try to occupy the kids for 20-30 minutes so he can settle in and we can chat. He likes having that bit of downtime. Otherwise, we enjoy a little pillow talk before bed. Hope you get to squeeze in a chat somewhere in the day!

      Reply
  7. These are some great ideas! I can see my husband and I doing them all. He’s currently deployed, but I know when he comes home we’re going to get back into the routine of being busy. When he was here we would have a movie night on Saturdays where we would put away our phones, make some popcorn, and just spend time together not worrying about anything but relaxing and being together. Also, for Valentines Day last year we bought a bunch of mini wine bottles without looking at the names of each. When we got home we covered the labels and had our own mini wine tasting session where we both took sips and took our own notes in our little notebooks. I think that was probably the most laughs we’ve ever shared. It was a great at home date night.

    Reply
    • I love the wine tasting idea! I’m totally stealing that ;). Thank you and hubby for your service and sacrifice!

      Reply
  8. As a busy newlywed who works opposite shifts of my husband, this was very helpful!

    Reply
    • So glad you found this helpful! Hope you can carve out some time. Every little bit counts!

      Reply
  9. Love your ideas! My favs are the backyard picnic and early morning coffee. We also had a very memorable date at the corner table in Taco Bell which happens to be the best ocean view in town!

    Reply
    • Bethany,

      Tacos by the ocean sounds AMAZING. To be honest, you had me at TACOS. 😊 Thanks for reading!

      Reply
  10. These are great ideas. I always call my husband at different times of the day (like break time during each of my jobs). He totally didn’t get it before, but now he looks forward to it, even if we don’t have much to say.

    I also really like the idea of a backyard picnic. Might have to be a balcony picnic for us…

    Reply
    • Monique,

      A balcony picnic sounds romantic! It is great that you stay connected to your husband throughout the day despite your busy schedule. Connection is so important.

      Thanks for sharing, and thanks for reading!

      Reply

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